Family Stressing You Out? 4 Tips To Not Lose Your Mind
Let’s face it, families can be extremely stressful! Some major holiday’s are approaching. Which means that you will likely be around family — perhaps more than usual.It’s not uncommon for people to become easily stressed during this season. Even when it’s not the holiday season, dealing with family stress causes many people to lose their minds.It’s always difficult when you are navigating family issues. You have respect and love for them, of course. However, setting boundaries and limitations is usually a challenge.If you are wondering how to navigate your family stressing you out, here are four tips to help you keep your sanity!
1. Set Your Boundaries
We’ve all been there. We are gathered around the family dinner table enjoying each other’s company. Laughter, catching up, and then comes the whammy. A family member asking you about your life. “When are you going to settle down?” “When are you having children?” “Aren’t you ever going to change your job?”
These may just be general questions, but, they sure can strike a nerve! Our first instincts is to respond right away. But, maybe you could try deflecting. If a family member is being too intrusive with their questions, you can calmly tell them that you will talk about it later. Or, to set a bigger boundary, you could tell them that right now, you are not comfortable discussing these details in front of everyone.
It may not make your family member happy, but, always remember that it’s no one’s business sharing the intimate “why’s and why not” details of your life. If you don’t want, you should not be obligated to, plain and simple.
2. Keep Your Head Clear
It’s inevitable, there will always be some type of argument when you are around family. If you aren’t in a family that doesn’t become argumentative in some way, kudos to you friend, you are rare!
Unfortunately, the past always seems to come up with family. And while, for the most part, these are beautiful moments of sharing in memories, it can become tense.
The best way to deal with tension in your family is try to keep your head as clear as possible. Instead of immediately reacting, take a deep breath and think about how you can respond. If you aren’t involved with the conversation, you can help de-escalate the situation by deflecting the conversation.
A lot of times, family arguments escalate because everyone takes a step back, feeling awkward. But, to avoid the stress that comes with this, sometimes it is best to try and intervene. Don’t be afraid to say, “This is not the time or place to talk about this. If you feel like it needs to be said, please step into another room.”
3. Accept That You Can’t Control Everything
Often times, we feel as if we have to control every situation. Unfortunately, you can’t control the actions or words of family. Whether it is your in-laws or an immediate family member.
It is very stressful trying to deal with the words and actions of others. Especially if their hurtful words are directed in some capacity towards you. As much as this can go against our very nature, sometimes the best way to handle family stress is to accept the things we can’t control.
4. Agreeing To Disagree
Especially in these times, sometimes it is best to just accept that you will never agree on everything. Tensions are super high and opinions could not be any more different. Whether that is on vaccines, mask mandates, politics, or cultural topics, everyone has an opinion.
And, of course, everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Even if we don’t agree with them at all. Sometimes, it is best to just let it go. When things are starting to get too heated over a topic, it’s normal for no one to speak up.
To keep the stress and tension low, don’t be afraid to stop it. You can respectfully say, “We all have differing opinions and arguing about them is not getting us anywhere, let’s just drop it and move on.”
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Dealing with stress and tension when it comes to our families is difficult. While we love them, sometimes it is best to just set boundaries and deal with things as they come. If you are experiencing anxiety because of your family, reach out to us today to help us support you to manage it.